De drie wijzen, Sluis (NL)

In Review by Mr Eggplant1 Comment

  • Sauce?
  • Salad

We visited this restaurant using one of modern societies greatest gifts, “group deals”. Mr. Eggplants parents got hold of a groupon voucher which offered a 40 EUR/pp menu for only 19 EUR/pp. Too good to be true right? Right! This was an epic failure. Before we start hammering down hard on this place, this is how they describe the place.

This restaurant is located near one of the nicest squares of Sluis, “de grote markt”. The chef got his/her chef’s degree from the renowned institute “Spermalie”, in Bruges. We serve excellent fresh classical dishes complimented with a selection of tasteful wines.De Drie Wijzen

When we entered the place was almost empty. The interior looks nice, you can even watch the chef prepare your food. It all started very promising, the waitress was very welcoming. We received our menu after we had been seated for only a few minutes so the service is pretty attentive. Drinks are priced very reasonably, we had two Kir Royals for 6,50 EUR each.

Here is where the good ends and the ugly starts. “Group Deals” should allow the restaurant to offer THE SAME quality that they normally offer for a cheaper price because a lot of people pay in advance. Some restaurants don’t get this concept and serve a “special” menu for people who made a reservation using groupon (or any other group deal website). We walked in with the promise of getting a 40 EUR/pp menu for half the price, what we got was a total disaster which should be priced 19 EUR but is actually worth 10EUR/pp. Keep in mind we are talking about a whole menu, not one dish.

To start off we took carpaccio of beef. We assumed it was going to be the regular carpaccio. Some very thin slices of meat , some rucola, some olive oil and some parmesan cheese. When we got our dish I was surprised (not in a good way). I looked at Mrs. Strawberry and she seemed a bit puzzled too. They turned my carpaccio into some kind of salad. There where three very thin slices of meat and the parmesan could only be detected under a microscope. They didn’t use olive oil but some kind of “dressing”. I still honestly do not know what it was, it tasted rather bad. What I did get was a whole plate of lettuce, rucola, carrots and some roasted pine nuts.  They would hang you if you served this in any traditional Italian village.

Next up, we had a simple steak with mushroom sauce. The waitress asked us how we wanted it and we both agreed on “medium rare”. The steak we got was anything but medium rare. I was rare and really hard to chew. At one point I had to take a sip of my wine in order not to die! The sauce was good (you had to pay extra for it). The french fries on the other hand where undercooked. It takes some real skill to be able to serve overcooked meat with undercooked fries. Guess that’s what you get for going to the “renowned institute of Spermalie”. The day before we went to this place I ordered a steak at Flunch, a restaurant near Auchan (a big French retailer). It was priced 9 EUR with all you can eat French fries and it was heaven compared to what I got at “de drie wijzen”. What part of the cow was this? I’m guessing “the sick part”.

As dessert we got a cup of coffee. Congratulations! You didn’t fuck up the coffee. If the whole menu had been priced 20 Eur/pp and it was now offered for 13 EUR/pp I would have been more forgiving. This restaurant should be ashamed for claiming this menu is normally worth 40 EUR/pp.

There are some other things worth mentioning. From the moment we walked in, until we walked out there was someone folding paper napkins on a table next to us. I guess this was part of some kind of origami workshop that the restaurant organises, with only one person participating. Then there was this moment when the staff seemed to have their lunch break. We understand, everybody has to eat but does this need to happen inside the restaurant? At this point, service was unresponsive. It was like I pressed the pause button of my playstation controller by accident and I just couldn’t resume the game. It’s just not professional.

When we got home I read some of the reviews this place got from other diners. Most of them agree with us that this place has to improve. There is one person who doesn’t agree. The owner/manager of this place can’t handle bad reviews and likes to comment on them. In his opinion, people should complain when they are there and not online. I think he’s still in his puberty because he tells people who complain how much other people like his food. Grow up man! Listen to your customers, especially to those who aren’t happy!

Menu: 39EUR
1/2l house wine: 14EUR
Sauce: 4EUR


Final Verdict

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About the author

Mr Eggplant

Born on a hot sunday morning near Pripyat in 1986.

Groote Markt 19,
NL-4524CD Sluis, The Netherlands

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